Edition of 50
150 x 210 mm
‘This book is a very personal story, a visual exploration into motherhood and postnatal depression. I have “started” this work two years ago, as a way to cope with the overwhelming feeling of being alien and out of place. It is a collection of photographs I took on my phone. It was the only thing that kept me sane, somehow connected me to outside world, made me forget about the paradoxical endless sense of loneliness that motherhood brought. It was as much as I could carry at that time, both mentally and physically, my phone camera. I left my job, I couldn’t socialise, and couldn’t really live a life. And I am not even saying normal life here, a life, any life.
These images were my attempt to digest the idea of being a mother while also being depressed, the idea of continuing something without the option of quitting, the idea of me as mother and the relationship to the outside world, which seemed completely alien to me.’
– Maria Babikova
About the Artist
Maria Babikova (b. 1990, Russia) received her BA in Fine Arts at the School of Visual Arts in New York. Working primarily in photography and film, Babikova’s work is often influenced by her personal context – her relationship to place and where she sits within the world. Born in the Soviet Union, a country that no longer exists, she was pushed into the highly competitive world of rhythmic gymnastics at an early age and later into the even more competitive world of modelling — experiences that underpin the themes explored in her work: questions of beauty, fear, rejection and belonging. Her recent work includes the documentary feature “Harmony” (2018), exploring the gender roles in Russian society through sport, and the photo project 3741.org, which aims to explore questions of European identity perceived by a foreigner, who very much exists within the European context.